What Could Have Been

A favorite story between my mother and me is the one where I, a wee baby/toddler, escape from our home and manage to return safe and sound. This was 1988 and we were living in a house in a neighborhood called Lakeview. It wasn't and still isn't the best part of town. There were not many Asian families in this mostly African-American neighborhood. There were not many Asian families in SF at this time. Period.

So... it is no surprise how shocked and scared my mother probably was when she discovered my father had fallen asleep (he was supposed to watch me) with the door unlocked. My mother left to purchase a lotto ticket from a store across the street.

No one knows what really happened after I managed to turn the knob, open the door, and leave the premises. Only those on the street (we lived on the "busy" commercial street of this neighborhood with a MUNI train line running across) who saw me can attest to what happened. I, unfortunately, was too young to remember a darn thing.

My parents only know that, after my mother returned home to a child-less house, I had managed to crawl/walk back to our house. Apparently, some kind gentlemen had followed behind me to see where I would go. And, I guess, to also make sure I was not in harm's way.

It is a bit terrifying and also very intriguing to know that any number of things could have resulted in a less than happy ending.

There's the obvious: scenarios about less than standup men/women who could have kidnapped me, no one noticing me or caring enough to look out for my safety, or I just did not know how to get home. And then there's just the simple fact that even caring people can make a poor choice of action.

Think about it. When we see young children and babies who are lost, what do we do? Those of us who are concerned and who are not so busy that we ignore them, we pick them up or take their hands to search for their parents. We either stay where we are or we walk around or we find the nearest information center or police precinct (depending on if you are in a store, mall or just out and about). What would have happened had someone decided to pick me up (for my safety)? Would I have been able to find my way home? And what made those men decide to just follow me instead of picking me up or taking me away from where they found me?

I have gathered two things from this story: 1) Babies are very intelligent, and 2) I could have been adopted (illegally) and leading a very different life from the one I know and (for the most part) love.